Chinese: 姻緣紅線 Yīnyuán hóngxiàn; red thread of marriage Japanese: 運命の赤い糸 Unmei no akai ito; the red thread of fate // 結び の 神 – Musubi* no kami; matchmaking, love and marriage.

Though there are multiple versions of the Red String of Fate tale, the more popular and well known version involves a young boy who, walking home one night, sees an old man standing beneath the moonlight. The man is Yue Xia Laoren, the old lunar matchmaker god, and he explains to the boy that he is attached to his destined wife by red thread and show him the young girl it will be. The boy being young and disinterest in marriage or having a wife picks up a rock and throws it at the girl before running away.

Many years later when the boy has grown into a man, his parents arrange a wedding for him. On the night of their betrothal, his wife waits for him in their bedroom with the traditional veil covering her face. Raising it, the man is delighted to find his wife is one of the great beauties of his village but wonders at the adornment she wears on one eyebrow. When asked about it, the woman responds that when she was a girl, a boy through a rock at her which left a scar on her eyebrow. He realises she was who he had thrown the rock at when he was a boy.

It is believed that there is a red cord attached to those that are destined to meet, and though it may twist and turn, tangle and stretch; it will never break and will ultimately bring two destined people together. In the original Chinese myth, the cord is fastened around the individual’s ankle. In Japan, it is bound from the male’s thumb to the female’s little finger; and in Korean culture, the red thread is thought to be fastened to the little finger of each party.

The red string of fate is a theme that turns up a lot within Eastern Asian literature and film, but also within the Western media and mythologies; though it is more commonly referred to as soulmates and twin flames.

While the stories they all tell are vastly different from the original folk tales, they all share the constant theme of two people finding each other no matter what. Even if they fall away from each other, or their lives twist and turn away from each other; they still find their way back to each other by the end. Oftentimes this is also after going through some form of personal transformation that makes the individual(s) better know themselves and understand others.

The Japanese animated film “Your Name” (君の名は, Kimi no No wa) tells the story of two characters, Mitsuha and Taki, who switch bodies when they fall asleep. At first they both think they’re just having a super realistic dream, then learn that those dreams are in actual fact real and that they are somehow switching bodies. They get to know each other by leaving messages and instructions to each other for when they wake up.

As the story progresses, they go in search for each other though it transpires their timelines are split three years apart from each other, so Taki doesn’t realise who Mitsuha is immediately when their paths first cross. Many years later, they are both living in Tokyo having forgotten the dreams they’d had, though they both have a sense of having lost something. They finally see and recognise each other again while on different trains that pass each other in a station which leads to them both getting off the trains and running across Tokyo trying to find the other.

“Musubi* is the old way of calling the local guardian god. This word has profound meaning. Tying thread is Musubi. Connecting people is Musubi. The flow of time is Musubi. These are all the god’s power. So the braided cords that we make are the god’s art and represent the flow of time itself. They converge and take shape. They twist, tangle, sometimes unravel, break, and then connect again. Musubi. Knotting. That’s time.”
Hitoha Miyamizu, Your Name

“Do you believe?
Even in a different time and a different dimension,
The one meant for you will appear and protect you.”
Xia Lin: Well Intended Love (Season 2)

In Well Intended Love (奈何BOSS要娶我, Nàihé BOSS yào qǔ wǒ), a relationship between the main characters Ling Yizhou and Xia Lin is initially instigated by a marriage contract. As the story progresses, the two fall in love with each other for real as they get to know each other. Even though Ling Yizhou loses his memory while hypnotised at one stage, the strength of the relationship brings his memories back through the strong, underlying bond the two share.

It is more into season two that the red string of fate concept appears with the characters living in an alternate timeline. While the storyline is different to the first season, it follows the characters as they find their destined partners. At the very end of the second season, Xia Lin is dreaming and sees flashes of the original story of how she and Yizhou came together and speculates that in every version of their lives, she and Yizhou would find each other some way.

The Korean drama It’s Okay Not to Be Okay (사이코지만 괜찮아, Saikojiman Gwaenchanh-a) which has just started on Netflix is a brilliant example of the dark and brooding side to the red string of fate and twin flames. A romance with a difference, it follows the healing journey of the two main characters and shows their emotional and psychological wounds in a profound manner.

Much like the original folk tales, It’s Okay Not to Be Okay shares flashbacks to the main characters as children when their paths first crossed. One is hurt and runs away and it isn’t until they’re adults that their paths finally re-unite.

A red string of fate relationship is one that is pre-destined and inexorable relationship that will occur at precisely the right moment. Whether the individuals are aware of each other or not, and no matter where their lives take them first, they will ultimately find their way to each other; and when they do finally come together, they will be in a place of understanding and balance which creates an unshakeable core to the relationship.

Twin flame relationships within the theory of the red string of fate eludes to a runner and a chaser – where one is more awake and aware of the connection while the other is either oblivious or freaked out by the intensity of the emotions. The roles can switch between partners throughout life, and there can be a lot of coming together and breaking a part as both deal with shadow work before a final union happens.

**Sadly because of the romanticisation of twin flame unions and soulmates, a lot of toxic and harmful relationships are over looked as “twin flame.” Shadow work refers to self improvement and self love, dealing with fears and past hurts and learning empathy and compassion to light up the darkness and become the epitome of yin and yang. It is important to know that any level of mental and/or physical abuse, the use gaslighting or any method for control and dominance is still an abusive relationship and anyone suffering from abuse needs help and support.

If you want to read more on Twin Flames, check out the post on ‘Twin Flames and False Flames’ here.

“And all along I believed, I would find you.
Time has brought your heart to me, I have loved you for a thousand years,
I’ll love you for a thousand more.”
Christina Perri – A Thousand Years

References:

The Taiwan Times. Find Love at Taiwan’s Top Five ‘Cupid Temples’.  https://thetaiwantimes.com/find-love-at-taiwans-top-five-cupid-temples/
TV Tropes. Red String of Fate. https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RedStringOfFate
Wikipedia. Read Thread of Fate. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_thread_of_fate

Media Quotes:

Christina Perri. A Thousand Years.
Jo Yong. It’s Okay Not to Be Okay (사이코지만 괜찮아).
Jordan Mechner. Prince of Persia (Sands of Time).
Makoto Shinkai. Your Name (君の名は).
Qiang Wu. Well Intended Love (奈何BOSS要娶我).

Original article: The Red String of Fate.

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Subtle energies are shifting and people are waking up in a spiritual sense, as we enter into an age where twin flames are finding each other around the world. But how can someone know about twin flames if they haven’t encountered one, and what makes someone in a relationship so certain they found “the one” – their twin flame? A fair question to ask of anyone.

Specifically me. I’m still single, so what the hell do I know? It’s something that has been with me every waking moment of my life and became a major theme throughout The Sirin Chronicles especially with Aengal during A Dawn of Dreams. It’s something I’m always reading about and studying in some way – meditation, dreams, automatic writing, and other people’s experiences and stories. It’s something I’ve already written about and will likely keep returning to it in the future as the journey of discovery continues.

A twin flame is that person that when you meet them and catch their gaze, you realise you’re looking at someone who’s soul mirrors your own. The world falls away and time stops. Nothing else matters but the bond between yourself and this stranger who has your heart racing and pulsing as an overwhelming force of magnetisms tugs at your essence, pulling you closer to this new person. You know without a doubt that they’re the one you’ve been looking for, that they’re a half of your being you hadn’t realised you were missing. All the world is blessed in a golden dew and wonder, and you know you’ve found what you were searching for all along.

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“So ancient is the desire of one another which is implanted in us, reuniting our original nature, seeking to make one of two, and to heal the state of man.” – Plato, Symposium

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Common traits of a twin flame union:

• A sense of destiny. You feel as though you’ve been searching for this person your entire life, and further beyond. You’ll recognise them from dreams, from the repetition of a particular face you see repeatedly through life, and a deep sense of de ja vu. They’ll likely be a new comer to your life when you least expect it, a stranger, but you’ll know without question who they are.
• Along with the sense of destiny, you’ll likey discover how closely your paths have been to each other. You’ll talk of places and events and wonder how you missed each other at so many different times.
• You sense each other’s essence and are fine tuned to their energies. You can tell what the other is feeling by feeling it within yourself. You’ll feel their physical presence when they’re nearby like  magnets pulling together.
• You bring out the best in each other and can both be your true selves. More often than not, you’ll be polar opposites of each other; from your personality to the experiences you had in life. Yet together you naturally find the middle ground and temper each other’s excessive opposites while still maintaining the individual self.
• Your values and what you seek from life will be aligned to each other.  From spiritual beliefs to profession and life goals. Maybe you want to eat more sustainably and organically and your partner has a green thumb. Perhaps you dream of travelling without ever leaving and they turn out to have itchy feet (or you finally take a leap of faith and travel solo for yourself only to find them along the way without looking.)

A true twin flame is rare to find and is often mistaken for a soulmate or a false flame – both types of karmic relationships. A soulmate is  someone who enters your life to teach you something about yourself and leaves again. They often enter as a romantic partner, though they can often enter your life as a family member, a friend or a stranger who leaves a lasting impression and some kind of lesson. A false flame is someone who appears in your life in a very similar way to a true twin flame, only they bring your shadow side to the surface along with any demons and secrets. These encounters usually come with a sense of foreboding, an ominous flutter in the pit of your stomach. Often the signs are missed or overlooked for the deep surge of lust that overcomes. 

It’s highly likely that someone will come across the false flame long before finding the true twin flame as, like with soul mates, the false flame will teach you a great deal about yourself. Your fears, your flaws, and all the things you dislike about yourself, or try to ignore. The love between false flames is wild and intense, oftentimes even negative. Both false flames together are being challenged to face up to and admit their shadow sides, and to learn multiple truths about themselves and what being in union with another soul means. There’s no knowing what these lessons could be as they are unique to each person and where they are along their path.

Nauthiz (ᚾ) from the Futhark runes is a wonderful icon to work with when it comes to false flames and self discovery. Much like Death and Tower in the Major Arcana of Tarot, Nauthiz is often seen as a negative rune as upright or reversed it signifies challenge and lessons. However it is a rune which is part of the cycle of self transformation and shares a very similar energy to the of The Tower. What no longer serves you? What must be shed to move on?

When it comes to twin flames, many sites and sources will cite that a part of a twin flame union includes testing and conflict, the “Dark Night of the Soul” or Void, and being a runner/chaser to a relationship. People cling to the relationship or their conviction that that person is the one, thinking they’ve found the twin flame. They hold on to the ideals that they can run long enough to escape their destiny, or to catch up and seize it.

As with The Tower card from Tarot. The Tower appears when someone is holding on to something or refusing change. They’re holding themselves back, perhaps keeping themselves to their very own ivory tower. In a reading, the card is sometimes a harbinger to some sort of change appearing which brings chaos and upheaval; or it is a warning to do some self discovery and find out what harmful and negative ways and/or thought systems you holding on to. The person who receives The Tower will be, or will have, been shaken to their very core and begun to question everything. The Tower may burn down, but it can be built again and better so.

The idea of such strife being a necessity to a relationship is an entirely unhealthy  thought process which has see people cling to negative (and potentially abusive and harmful) relationships believing that what they were experiencing was simply a part of twin flame union and if they hold out, it will all work out. Conflict comes from the ego and fear, though often those open up the person to more of themselves. It is in letting go of the fear and moving passed the false flame, and finding the true self, that someone is then open to receiving their twin flame.

Sometimes a person will encounter more than one false flame. Each cycle of relationship akin to a stage of metamorphosis and the shedding of old skin. It can take many incarnations for one soul to find their twin flame in the physical realm and the journey for finding such a love is a challenging one – especially when faced with the artificial love of a false flame and a world that is gradually becoming more and more detached from the physical.

But when the twin flame does finally appear in your life, known that it was worth the wait. No matter the darkness that came before, a twin flame relationship cannot be tarnished by shadows and demons by the time they encounter each other for the process of transformation and re-birth has been completed. A twin flame union is one of phenomenally high vibration and purest intent. It is a love like no other and greater than you could imagine.

If you think of the stereotypical “one true love” from fantasy, there was never the negativity with the lovers. When they met, they knew at once they had found their true love, their twin flame. There was no fear, no ego, no need to control the situation or each other, only the deep sense of knowing they were meant to be together. No matter how hard circumstances around them tried to pull them apart, destiny would always find a way to bring them back together. Together, their lives complemented each other while remaining their own much like the concept of Yin and Yang.

Of the people I have come into contact with that would be considered in a twin flame union, there was none of the toxicity that circulates the internet. Sure, there will always be tides of conflict – such is human nature – however they navigate the troubles as a team and find their way together, they aren’t driven apart by the hardships or driven to fury and rage. They’re also couples that new immediately that they had met “the one” and when they finally entered into a relationship, remained together to this day or as wedding vows go, ’til death did them part.

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Finally…I couldn’t possibly write about twin flames and not include a video of The Lost Song (all parts) by Anathema.

Original article: Twin Flames and False Flames.

He was so beautiful, eyes so brown and deep my soul fell straight out of this reality. Time stopped, the world vanished, my heart raced and a fever took over me, and for a moment that was both an eternity and no time at all, there was nothing else in existence but us two. Not even physical bodies, just two souls pulled from a physical existence. Then it was over, I was back in the room feeling incredibly faint and weird, and we both continued on our way like nothing happened. And perhaps for him, nothing happened. To this day I can’t explain what happened to me, or why. All I knew then was that I’d heard a cold, chilling voice telling me he was the one and I’d never truly love another and that we would never be together.

There was so much weird stuff after that encounter as well. if ever I was close in proximity to him, I’d be drawn towards as though some unseen force had taken over me, or my soul was magnetised to him. My feet would carry me towards him, or an unseen hand would turn my head to look at him. Always I’d see those enchanting brown eyes looking back at me, a reflection of my own distant, confused expression as our paths crossed.

It also felt wrong, it was never the magnetism go two being inexplicably drawn to each other, but of two positives or two negatives being pushed together. To a point, they’ll pull towards each other, but then they will violently jerk away or simply slide past each other. Hardly the sensation that fills you with confidence. I wanted to ask him about it, not as a desperate attempt at love, but as someone who may or may not have been suffering the same crazy stuff I was. I didn’t have anyone else I could ask. 

We never talked. I don’t know what Fortuna has against me, but it was a constant string of disasters and embarrassments for myself. People who weren’t really friends made a further fool of me that fate alone could manage…and I really did look like the worst freak you can visualise. I wouldn’t have spoken to me either.

Then there were the dreams where he would be present. Right at the beginning, there were so many. I was going through a really bad time, and it was like this person was watching over me, making sure I wouldn’t end it all and chasing the nightmares away. I wanted to know so badly if they were two-way dreams, and still, do.

They got less over time; mostly I wanted to forget all about that person. I wished I’d never seen them, wished I could rip my heart out or force it to obey my mind; and for a time I would forget all about him, maybe even for years. But, surer than the sun will rise, a night would come when, for no reason and no prior conjuration, he would come back to me. I’d wake up in a fever, every single memory once again un-locked. 

Still no explanation. Still so many questions. Who was he? What was he? Was he my twin flame? A soul mate? Why did we meet? Is it a past life thing? Am I just insane? All I could do was start the process of suppressing the memories and forcing all thoughts of him away again, each time it happened.

Over ten years later from that encounter, I often look back and wonder what happened to that sweet, innocent little girl that just wanted to live in paradise, fulfil her every dream and be totally enthralled in love, or even to the slightly messed up, goth teenager that still wanted to find love even among the chaos and constantly fought for the light.

I don’t know what love feels like, and that little girl that would never have gone back and changed anything, dreamt of Disney princes and may have met her true love – she simply wants to find a strong enough banishment spell to forget that person, or one that will turn back time to never meet that person. Or if one such spell existed, it would be one to entirely obliterate her soul from all existence.

In all I’ve read about twin flames, it seems that both know and recognise the other even if they aren’t “together” at any one time. I never got the vibe from him that he had shared in that strange awakening or experience. I feel like that encounter and all that happened after was purely one-sided which would put him right out of the twin flame category.

There would be times, sometimes even now, where I’ll have a sense of Deja vu, and its like I’m living across to realities. I’m fully aware of the present and where I am, and also of this other vision where I’m looking for him to walk into the room, or I’ll look at my phone because the Deja vu showed he was calling/texting me, and those things never happened. It’s like something is broken and wrong.

I sometimes wonder it was something else going on, though quite what I’ve never worked out. Maybe it was some strange crossing of several realities, times and existence, and at that moment I wasn’t looking at that person, but someone else looking through that person as a vessel. Maybe someone that looks similar to the person they used as a portal. Who knows. I’ve done all sorts to try and debunk the situation and to make it something so ludicrous it looses power.

Original article: Twin Flame Experience?.